What Do You Truly Desire? Reflections on Dreams, Effort, and Acceptance

London

Sometimes, you want something so badly, but it just doesn’t happen. Days, months, or even years can pass, and your desire remains, yet the outcome doesn’t change. We’ve all heard the cliché: “If you want something enough, it’ll happen.”But how many times have you found yourself saying, “I really want this, I’m trying so hard, but it’s just not happening!”

I’ve been there, too. I’ve wanted things desperately, and sometimes they didn’t happen. Years ago, I lost faith in the idea that sheer desire could make something a reality. But when I looked back at my life, I realised that many of my wishes had, in fact, come true. It felt as though I’d been unfair, dismissing the power of wanting something. And yet, there were also wishes that simply never materialised.

So what’s the truth behind this? Is there even a “truth” to it?

Let me clarify upfront: I don’t claim to have all the answers. Like many of you, I’m navigating my own journey, seeking truths along the way. In this process, I’ve uncovered certain beliefs, and today, I’d like to share them with you.

Are You Sure You Truly Want It?

There were many times I thought I wanted something deeply, only to realise later that I didn’t actually want it at all. Confused? Let me explain.

Sometimes, we fixate on wanting something — like a specific item — without questioning where that desire came from. For instance, you might dream of owning a particular car. You convince yourself it’s your dream car, and every time you see it on the street, you sigh with longing. But if you dig deeper, you may realise that this desire isn’t truly yours. Maybe a friend planted the idea, and you unknowingly adopted it as your own. Or perhaps owning a car isn’t even on your genuine list of priorities.

When a desire isn’t truly yours, neither you nor the universe seems to work in your favour. You end up frustrated, wondering why your wish isn’t coming true.

Do You Hold Deep Beliefs That It’s Impossible?

I discovered that sometimes, even when I thought I wanted something deeply, I held limiting beliefs that it could never happen. And I’ve seen this in others, too.

Let’s say your dream is to work at a prestigious company. You admire its employees and think, “If only I could work there someday.” But when you’re alone, your inner voice says, “Who am I kidding? Look at their employees — they’re all graduates of top schools. I’d never get through their interviews!”

If you hold such self-limiting beliefs, let me be blunt: No matter how much you say you want it, it won’t happen. You’re sabotaging yourself. You don’t need external obstacles; your own doubts are enough to hold you back.

At this point, it’s crucial to identify where these beliefs come from and work on changing them. Once you reconcile these doubts, you can refocus on your goal with renewed clarity and determination.

Why Do Some Desires Come True?

When I’ve had clear, detailed reasons for wanting something, those desires almost always materialised. In fact, I can’t recall a single instance where they didn’t. It’s as if the universe conspires to make it happen.

If you don’t know why you want something, you won’t be able to convince yourself — or anyone else — that it’s worth pursuing. Start by asking yourself: Why do I want this? Think about what achieving it would mean for you and how it might benefit others. Write it down, visualise it, and focus on how it could transform your life.

Those who are clear about what they want and why they want it often find the motivation to take consistent action. When setbacks arise, they remind themselves of their reasons and keep going.

A Personal Story

After living in London for two years, I dreamed of moving into a beautiful house with a garden. When we started searching for a new home, my husband and I listed everything we wanted in an Excel sheet — including the specific area we were targeting.

There was a park about 2 km from our apartment where I often went for walks. One day, I decided to spend the entire day in the park. I walked through the three streets leading to the park and thought, “Wouldn’t it be amazing to live on one of these streets?” I even took photos of the middle street, which I loved the most.

Believe it or not, three months later, we rented a house on that exact street — right at the spot where I had taken the photo! Months after moving in, I stumbled upon that photo and couldn’t believe the coincidence.

Çektiğim fotoğraf =)

When Even Effort Isn’t Enough

Sometimes, you do everything right. You have clear reasons, unshakable motivation, and you put in all the effort — and yet, it still doesn’t happen. These moments are puzzling but often lead to clarity.

When a desire isn’t aligned with who you are or what you need, the journey itself teaches you to accept it with grace. You come to terms with the outcome, recognising that the effort wasn’t wasted — it was an experience that added value to your life.

My Secret Superpower

As a child, I loved TV shows and movies about superheroes. I dreamed of having a superpower that would let me get anything I wanted effortlessly.

Over time, I’ve come to believe that I do have a superpower: the ability to clearly define my desires, put in the effort, and accept the outcomes with grace.

And you know what? That’s more powerful than I ever imagined. 😊